My Own: Private Tea Party

There was a Tea Party Planned at Casapinka for tomorrow, but it has been postponed.. So until then, I think I will have my own private tea party, right here, on my sill, and just bask in the warmth of the sun that peeked out of the clouds, it seemed, only for me. Isn't it beautiful?
But I may say, that is quite a bit of tea for one, and I have many more teacups.... Would you like to join me? I have Moroccan, green, and black tea, which would you prefer?

My Own: Looking Up

Sometimes, I stumble, sometimes, I fall, sometimes, I crash, but then sometimes I feel like I what I did was right, but I find out, I was wrong. These are times when I may cry, I may beat myself up, but in the end I realize that the only way to fix what I've done is to look up. Look to HIM to heal my hurts, ease my pain, humble my way of thinking, help me learn from my mistakes, and to move on.

Today, I'm looking up.

My Own: A Flowery Compilation

"Perpetual Blooms"- always beautiful

*More here*

"Mouths of the Dragons"- in a butterfly garden

*More here*

"Succession"- I thought this was an interesting concept of arrangement.

*More here*

"Bouquet of Memories"- each flower brings back memories. They were a gift from my little friends, Mackenzie and Logan.

*More here*

"Pistil"- My oldest sister, Jenny, used to call her kids that and say " Pistils, walkin' in the tulips". I thought for a second that this gazer was going to be a pistil and not open. But I told it to and the next morning it did. The power of believing in the power of your words. "Believe you receive and you shall have the desires of your heart."

*More here*

My Own: Wishful Thinking and Air Bubbles

Another Brilliant Photographer: Larry Broder

My friend, Maryam in Marrakesh, and I have such similar tastes sometimes it frightens me. Through her blog, My Marrakesh, I happened on a new photographer idol. Ok, not idol, but someone to look up to- Larry Broder. When I saw the review Maryam had done on Larry, explaining his experiences in Morocco, I went to his site and started to click around. Not only did I find many wonderful shots of Morocco, but of, Peru, Italy and others. As I studied each shot, I noticed that he shoots photos in quite a similar way to the way I prefer to shoot- naturally.


I admire photographers who have an appreciation for nature, and I admire even more, those who have developed a technique that allow the shots roll out in such a way that make they look so real that they're surreal. All without the aid of computers, so I know he is one good photographer.

In my opinion, what makes a photographer is not his accolades, who he's worked with, or even where he has shot, but the ability to see an opportunity for a beautiful shot through his own eyes and stay true to it with the eye of a camera. That's just what Larry does, he sees something, captures it, and stays true to it's original colors and light showing it's real beauty, so when you look at the photo compared to the place or thing itself, you see no difference. This is what I aspire to be as a photographer.

*All photos provided by Natural Light Photography- Larry Broder

Me: Eighteen

Happy Birthday, to me, hee hee!

Last year I posted some little poetic type thing on my myspace blog and I wanted to do something like that this year, but I'm am feeling poetically drained. My creative juices have been limited to photos lately and my thoughts are leaning towards the same things and I'm beginning to feel like a skipping record. Everything I say seems to sound the same to me, the words I use, the style I write in. I don't know if it does to you, but I'm starting to be annoyed by it.

If/when I feel the poetic juices start to flow again I'll jot what I feel in my notebook/journal and type it up, But for now,

Last night as a seventeen year old-
First pic as an eighteen year old-

For record purposes:
~First person to say Happy Birthday, today, Faith or Charity( I was half a sleep)
~My first kiss as an eighteen year old went to my 4 yr old nephew, Aidan.

I think it's funny to keep track of stupid stuff like this...

~Happy Birthday was sung to me by, not only my whole family, but also by my best friend, Diamond, who called from Nashville and sang over the phone bringing tears to my eyes. And my Moroccan friend, Karim, called and sang it to me in English, French, and Darija. I was almost in tears by the end of the Darija version. I've never heard Happy Birthday in any form of Arabic before, so I was "touched", as Diamond would say.

~I was given some grown up presents - 2 bouquets of flowers and a $100 spa gift certificate. I can not wait for the mani/pedi and I'm not sure what else I'll go for, but it will be fun because my sister, Jennifer, has one from Christmas, so we'll go together.
As for the rest of the presents, I'll have to take pictures and make a list later. Many of them will go VERY nicely with my Moroccan room.

That's all for now, I have to go find a place to put the presents and fabric that is occupying my bed so I can go to sleep.

Here are the links to the John Mayer Photos from last night and to the Birthday Party Photos from tonight.

Brilliant : John Mayer

Yes, John Mayer is Brilliant, hee hee. Well, I just got back from this wonderful event and let me say, it was the stuff. I don't think I'll have a voice tomorrow actually, and I managed to get a few pictures and video(thanks to my 2G memory card, birthday gift, from Ben). I'm pretty tired tho, so I'll not say much right now, other than it was awesome.

These are probably the best pics I have, I'll upload to fotki tomorrow and try to get the videos on to You Tube or something (they're really long).

Thank you!

You know, I love my friends! Even those of you whom I have only just become acquainted with. I find only the best support from all of you and you have no idea how much it means when I find a comment in my inbox from one of you. I get this huge smile on my face and get all excited to read what you have to say, or ask in some cases. I absolutely love it! Your comments and support are what I seem to find myself leaning on when I start to feel like this career choice may not work out or when I feel like my journey to Morocco is a dream light years from becoming reality. So I'd like to thank you, especially those of you who have encouraged me to go keep pushing towards Morocco. I believe that dream is about to come true and I couldn't have gotten there without the support and encouragement of my friends: Eleni, Maryam, Steffi, Karim, Jill, Pink, Liosliath. Tho many of you may not really know me all that well and maybe only left one or two comments here, I still really appreciate you.

As for my photographic endeavor supporters: Hope, Maryam(again :)), Ben, Don, Jay- Thank you, for the tips, tricks, inspiration, opinions, and support. It means a lot to know that you think I can actually take hold of this ambition and make something out of it.

My photo offering for today has absolutely nothing do to with my thankfulness....

...but I thought it was funny, perfect, placid, fresh snowfall all interrupted by a squirrel trail from one tree to another in my backyard. The angles really caught my eye, and I really love the tree shadows.

This Morning

I'm posting partially this morning to tell you how much I think about my blog friends on a regular basis. Now, not in a weird or bad way, but just while I'm taking pictures or I see something they've mentioned, or I remember some advice they've given. Now most of the people I call "blog friends" may not even read my blog, because I'm a bad reader and don't usually leave comments, due to time issues. I intend on doing it, but usually I'm using Google Reader to save time and I'm not on their actual site. Anyway, to the authors of the blogs I do read, sorry if my stalker ways offend. But really and truly, I do love your blogs.

So, I wasn't sure if Pink read my blog, and would ever see this photo, but just this morning she left me a comment from her page Casapinka
So Pink, this is partly for you and partly to show what I've been learning from Stephanie and Mav of 3191. Morning's natural light is quite nice :)
















My other reason for posting is that the US Embassy in Casablanca's website, is not being helpful! This link is the first thing my dad read when he went looking for info on contacting them. I think he needs to talk to a Moroccan or an American living there to really get the real feel of what could happen. But he wants an unbiased opinion.

Come to think of it, why are we basing life on "what if's"? Ok, before I get frustrated, I'll stop*deep breath*everything will be alright. So, does anyone know how to ease a father's mind about his 18yr old daughter going to Marrakech, Morocco in March? Suggestions are welcomed...

Until later~Hugs

The Talk

Today I whipped up the guts to talk to my dad about the possibility of going to Morocco in March. I happened on some very cheap tickets( $397) and I decided that it was time, I needed to jump all over it. So with a little more motivation from Kheireddine's and my good friend, Steffi, I put together a proposal, prayed for favor, walked downstairs and asked my dad. I was a little thrown off when he let me talk and didn't say blatantly " Not a chance!" We had an adult conversation, where I was also an adult explaining to him my reasons for going were not just to have a fling, that I'd be exploring possibilities. Possibilities of a relationship, possibilities of a summer there, possibilities of a life there in the future. I explained that there were people there who are ready to welcome me, that there are friends there that I can trust to take care of me if need be. Then I told him what I had to offer in return- an American Literature course finished before, March. He says he has no issue with money and no issue with Kheireddine but still, he's a bit skeptical about my safety- a true father. So he's going to call or email the embassy there to ask their opinion. Any ideas of what they'll say? I'm just sitting here in suspense..





Photo, "Silence," taken yesterday. More here.

Birthday Present on Valentine's Day, Yipee!

Happy Birthday to me :) from some of our family's sweetest and dearest friends, Maury and JoAnn.


They must know of my love for Morocco and almost all things paisley. It's a Vera Bradley Pink Elephants hipster. So cute and will be great for travel.. to Morocco! But to make this gift even better, the a 10% of proceeds goes to breast cancer research.


Hmm, is Vera Bradley going Moroccan too? Check out that box! I think that will be my new memory box. Big smiles here :)

Special Message for a Certain Habibi

Today's post may be a little familiar, because I posted a conversation hearts photo about a month ago, but today it comes with variation. A played with picture(above) and one that is more plain(below). My reason for posting them again today is because it is indeed Valentine's Day. They have some very special words on them intended for a sweetheart named Kheireddine, and though I tell him all the time, each time means just a little more than the last. Everyday we grow together, though we are on opposite sides of the world. We still feel each others' love, though we are oceans apart. Instead of giving up and growing impatient when time seems to be lost, somehow we end up learning and loving more. He is like no other man I've ever known. He loves me, and only me, with an unconditional love that can not be surpassed. I'm proud to call him mine and I thank God for him with every breath. So to him and to you all, Happy Valentine's Day with much love! ~ Hadassah xoxo

More Birthday Fun?

Well, actually, yes, the twins had another birthday party. A second party is somewhat required with as large a family as ours, but my camera was set funky so no really good pictures came out of that.

Instead, I'll give you something from the past-


November 15th to be exact. This is my Other little sister, Joy. I've posted about her before, but she's just so darn photogenic and these pictures were too cute to keep to myself.
So here's a little about Joy- She is 5 years old and while she looks Japanese, like the twins, she also is Chinese. Her favorite things to do are; sing as loud as physically possible, dress up in tutus and princess clothes, do Disney character impersonations, and look at herself in the mirror. Oh yes, and recently she has taken up "telling secrets", which is really her way of saying she wants to talk to you.
Here she is doing what she does most days(if I let her)- laying on my bed staring at the mirror while wearing dress up clothes.

Here is another, that same day-


I like that these totally capture "Joy" and show so much about her charming little personality.

Ps. Maryam, that's my "Moroccan" room, still unfinished. I think my next post will be about the finished product. Hmm, if I could only do that by the end of the week AND finish American Lit... Wish me luck! :)

My Own: Frost Bite- Part 2

I woke up this morning to see that it was snowing :) and that the frost I posted about previously had melted and refrozen. Personally, I think it's prettier today than it was yesterday, no?
Lately it's been SO cold that the snow that falls is actually in individual flakes- like they are shown in science book diagrams. Each little flake is unique and special in it's own way. Kind of like the little girls below.
These little girls turned 7 today, and yet they are twins, they are two different individuals.
I gave them each a card showing just that, Charity (the older one) is the Ballerina - Figure Skating - Gymnast - Princess, while Faith is the Ballerina - Gymnast - Soccer Star - Princess. One is "pretty in pink" the other is more of a "tomboy" but not to the extreme. They will both whip out the dress up everyday after school, they both love Barbies and dolls and tea parties of all kinds. But Faith is more likely to wear jeans and gauchos while Charity wears dresses and skirts. These little snow flakes have developing personalities and everyday I watch as they become more of themselves and less "the twins".

Their first words this morning- Faith, " I feel much older today!" Charity, " Yeah, I feel 2 inches taller!"

Here are the links to - Frost Bite2 set and Charity and Faith's 7th album, enjoy!

My Own: Frost Bite

This was taken during my blown surprise issue, while I was cooling down..

I'm enjoying the beauty of all the frost on my windows. It looks like little ice trees.

For more see my Frost Bite Set

I've Blown the Surprise

Now that I've blown my birthday surprise, I am going to spill my guts.

I was so devastatingly nuts when I realized what I had just seen, I think I swore over 50 times in the course of 7-10mins. I felt horrible. I mean I wanted to know what it was, but I didn't, you know. I like surprises, and I secretly liked the torture they were giving me by saying that it was the best present ever, but never telling me what it was. AHHHH!!! Why did I open mom's mail. I SWEAR, I only thought it was an advertisement. Why would the envelope say "After 5 Days Return To: Customer service", on the out side? I guess there is a reason to listen to your gut when it says, "I wonder how mad dad will be if I open this?" A reason not to reason with yourself, "It's only and Ad, he won't care. Plus, I'm technically E.A. Bullis now, right?"

So, I opened it.










There was a Netflix ad, "Ok, it is only some Netflix words "John Mayer" I closed the envelope and tossed it across the counter.

"Oh sh*t! I did NOT just see what I thought I saw?!?!"
"Oh God, I'm and idiot! This is bad, REALLY Bad! Sh*t!... Sh*t!" "F*ck! Why?!?! Why send my birthday present to E.A. Bullis?!? For all intents and purposes, I'm E.A. Bullis! I DO I carry her credit card.. AHHHH!!!! WHY, PEOPLE, WHY?!?!?!?"

After swearing a couple thousand more times, I went upstairs and called Hope's cell, no answer, so I left a message, hung up, and continued my swearing fit..

"Why people, why? You said 'Don't open anything addressed to [YOU]!!'"
"They were right tho, other than a trip to Morocco, this is best birthday present ever! I never would have guessed."
I guess, I'm just thankful now that I didn't throw it away. How devastating would that have been? I'm glad I have a habit of opening junk mail.

So I was a little stressed, ok, a LOT stressed, not to mention mad at myself for opening it, i knew how disappointed Hope would be if she didn't pull off her WHOLE surprise, not to mention now she can't torture me anymore. Seriously tho, Ads! I thought they were ads! To cool off a little I had a mini photo shoot, of some frost on my window(I'll post that separately) and waited for Hope to call back.

She called back and explained, she had to address it to the name on the credit card and she didn't think I would open Mom's mail. Since I knew what it was, she told me that the plan was that all my brothers and sisters (minus Ricky) would meet at Hope's work and we'd head out from there to "pick out [my] present together". We'd drive to Northern Ill. University and when I saw John Mayer in lights I'd freak out and realize what was happening. Somehow they may have been able to pull all that off, because I'm usually oblivious, but I think I would have thought something funky was up when All 5 of us, plus a girlfriend and a friend, had to be together to "pick out" my present.. Anyway, we determined that it's Dad's fault. He was supposed to keep the mail out of the mailbox.... lol Somehow, I got to it today before he could.

So, YES, Hope IS the best sister in the world, and somehow she topped last year's, although that was pretty darn amazing and maybe 15 times more conniving.

Friends, we have a banner!

Ok, today's feature ~ the beautiful "La Vie Par Mes Yeux- Life Through My Eyes" banner above!

This is the work of my brother, Ben. He's awesome at this stuff, absolutely awesome! And while he's not one to "eat up" praise, I am not one to let "kind deeds" go unnoticed. So a big, "THANK YOU!" to my wonderful brother.

The photography was taken by myself, and all graphic and html work was done by Ben Bullis, who's company is iSynergy Inc.. PC and network consulting/supporting is his forte, but he is darn good at graphic design as you can see. Anyway, yeah, he's my brother.

Here's the original photo-

That I turned into this-

And Ben turned into this-

Ps. Check out this new site, Awahe.com, my habibi's :)